haptalaon | (no subject)

Oh gods, I've been back on tumblr for like five minutes (to try and drum up a Following and a Presence and be Known as a Thing, and also to source out more good imagery), and my stress level is through the roof. I don't really know how else to reach out to people who might be looking for what I'm creating & have energy and ideas to bring to this kind of current.

Like, it's kinda working, but I hate it. I can't even face opening the tab to look. I don't know what it is about tumblr pagan community that gives me the willies and feels so hostile, so very threatening and transactional, even when it's just a damn image board for sharing pretty pictures that's perfect for trying to Curate A Mood with. But the experience of broadcasting to an infinity of strangers is scary, and it feels exposing.

It doesn't feel like the dynamic of standing on a platform speaking to people who have chosen to attend my lecture, as my blog does; nor does it feel like the dynamic of chatting in your own kitchen while a bunch of friends who are staying over just mill about and drink tea and half-listen to what you're saying, like Dreamwidth does. It feels like being in the centre of a mob, who are at present standing in silence and looking intently, poised to respond.

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... yeah. I could never get into Tumblr for any of their many communities. I frequently think of doing an Instagram lifestyle blog thing, but I’m always too paralyzed by the idea to follow through.

(I like your description of DW. Sometimes it feels like an empty void, but also sometimes it feels like the coziest and nicest place on the ‘net.)

One extremely charming thing about Dreamwidth culture is the number of people who have, like, sent me a "letter of introduction" to announce they are following me/ask to subscribe to my private list. (In fact, I think you wrote one? It isn't just you, I've had like...four or five...)

It's very Jane Austen, very Medieval guilds, very...I mean, it is a form of developed online-culture etiquette. And I think it forms/is formed by the Dreamwidth culture. When your engagement with someone's twitter, tumblr, insta is the clicking and unclicking of a "FOLLOW", then it's cementing your role as a content-consumer. Rather than the overtones of friendship and respect that come with an introductory letter.

Yes, I did send a PM (I think you suggested it somewhere in your “about” info). On DW, I try to comment or such on how I found a person if it’s not obvious (particularly if they tend to have access locks) because it does feel like a smaller, more intimate community.

Yeah any time I start using Tumblr at all seriously I get all twitchy and pull back. I wish I knew anywhere else to look though.

Tumblr hasn't been the same since Yahoo bought it. There used to be several really good folk there, but anymore it seems like its the pre-teen White Light We Must all Get Along, or the Wicca-Wanna-Blessed Bees, to quote Willow from Buffy.